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She also made sure she played with other skilled players so that she did not develop bad habits or settle for mediocre play. Well, developing relationship intelligence is no different.I read the book Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell over the holidays and he says it takes 10,000 hours of practice to become an outstanding success at something. My guess is we have all spent way more than 10,000 hours in interactions with other people but unfortunately, this does not in and of itself translate into a higher amount of relationship intelligence.
Unless like Serena Williams, we are using the rules of the game in a way that improves our interactions, we could spend a million hours at it and not have high RQ.A good example of this is the TV show Everybody Loves Raymond where virtually everyone on it has low RQ. It's a funny show but most people would not want to live a life like the one depicted on that show. Most people would prefer their relationships to be warm, loving, spirited and happy.
The best way to gauge your RQ is to look at your past and current relationship's and ask yourself "How am I doing?"If you have a successful romantic relationship, good solid friends, children who interact with you in loving ways and you are well liked and respected in your work, then you're doing pretty well and probably won't need any help in this area. But if you have conflicted or unsuccessful romantic relationships, have conflicts with your children or have trouble with your co-workers then you might consider some Relationship Intelligence coaching. http://thelanguageofdesirebookreview.com/